By Degrees Elle Casey

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.I m so nervous that I m strongly consideringthrowing up in the bushes that line the path to the front of thehouse.Unfortunately, since I haven t eaten anything intwenty-four hours, I m sure it ll just be painful dry heaves, soI give up on the idea pretty quickly.The house is up on a small hill and most of it is hiddenbehind shrubs and small trees.The windows are shut uptight and the hum of an air conditioning unit makeseverything seem so benign.The monster I picture waitingfor me inside is being very quiet.I see no signs of her.Will it be Tarin s new girlfriend? An old girlfriend? Isthis Jelly s house that he bought her that they live intogether? Did he change his mind about wanting to be withme?None of my guesses make much sense.Why gothrough all this drama and refuse to tell me anything overthe phone, unless the only goal is to humiliate me? And Ican t think of a single thing I ve done to deserve that fromhim, so that can t be it.I put one foot in front of the other, slowly making myway up the front walk. Might as well get it over with, I sayto the lizard that crosses the path in front of me.I take thestairs up, pausing after each one.There s a black metalrailing on either side of this part of the walkway, and I holdonto it.It s hot from the late morning sun, the paint chippedand peeling.There is no breeze to cool me down and I msweating.The back of my shirt is going to be stuck to mein no time.I reach the red door and stand there.I want it to flyopen immediately, Tarin so anxious to see me that hedoesn t wait for me to ring the bell.But that doesn thappen.The door remains shut and there s no sign thatanyone s even expecting me.I look for a doorbell and seeone to my right, but it has a piece of paper taped over it.Don t ring bell.Knock softly, it says.I recognizeTarin s handwriting.I frown as my finger hovers over the paper. What thehell? I debate whether to ignore the sign and hit thatmother about twenty times.How dare he mess with myhead and then tell me not to ring the goddamn doorbell!But I don t do what my first instinct tells me to do.I liftmy hand and knock softly as instructed.Dropping my armto my side, I take a deep breath and wait for my destiny tounfold.Chapter Fifty-ThreeTHE DOOR CRACKS OPEN AND Tarin s face is in theopening. You came. He s not smiling.My heart sinks.So much for hope. Of course I came. Because I m a sucker and I mstupid and I fell in love with you.When will I ever learn?We stand there staring at each other through an eight-inch gap. Well? I finally say, getting more irritated by thesecond. Are you going to let me in? Introduce me to yourgirlfriend?He says nothing in response, just opens the doorwider and moves back so I can step inside.So there is another woman.I m crushed.I knew it.Idespise him for forcing me over here to meet her.I hatethat he s making me confront the person who s stolen himaway from me.My nostrils flare wide as I barely hold backmy anger.I m tempted to punch whoever she is in the face,but maybe I should just thank the bitch for taking him off myhands instead.Better to be wounded by heartache nowthan killed by it later. I really appreciate you coming, he finally says.Heshoves his hands in his front pockets and stares at myknees. I m not sure why, I say as he backs up and uses hiselbow to close the door softly behind him. Is this somekind of sick joke? Did you want to gloat or something? I mlooking around, trying to catch a glimpse of the bimbot.Iknow she s a dumb blonde fan freak.She has to be.Theyall are.Holy shit, it s probably Posey.I pray it isn t her so Idon t have to end up in jail for murder. No, it s not a sick joke.Why would you think that?He s looking at me confused. Did you talk to Zach? Of course I talked to Zach.Do you think I d ride all theway over here in complete silence? No.But & never mind.So you know why you re here,then. Pretty much.Where is she? I don t see her in thekitchen or the family room from where I m standing.She sprobably hiding if she knows what s good for her. She s in the bedroom. Why isn t she out here greeting me with you?Figures.Chicken shit.She knows what she s doing iswrong, that s why she s hiding.Good.I hope the guiltfollows her around for the rest of her life like the regret willfollow me.It s only fair.He stares at me, a mixture of hurt and confusionmarring his handsome features. She s back theremarring his handsome features. She s back therebecause she s sleeping.Listen & do you want to do thisanother time? I thought you d want to do this sooner ratherthan later, but maybe it was a bad idea. Oh, no, please, let s do this now. I snort with disgust. Let s just get this thing rolling.We ll make it a real goodknock down, drag out too, if you want. I d rather not.She kept me up all night and I mexhausted.I swallow the hurt and let the anger well up to takecontrol.Hands on my hips, I shake my head at him. Youknow, you re really something else.I was so wrong aboutyou.You really had me fooled. That sounds like a bad thing, he says cautiously.I throw my arms up. What the fuck, Tarin!He puts his fingers to his lips, his face a mask ofurgency. Shhhh! Would ya keep it down! She ssleeping!This is too much.I cannot believe he s actually doingthis. We ll just see about that, I say, leaving him to godown the hallway, long strides taking me far and fast. Where is she? I want to meet this bitch. What are you doing, Scarlett? he says coming afterme. You can t call her a bitch, what the hell is yourproblem?! He s whisper-screaming at me, making merealize how this person must really have him wrappedaround her finger to have him so hyper about disturbing herdamn beauty sleep.The last door on the right is closed.I reach it just asTarin catches up to me.He yanks me back by my arm andTarin catches up to me.He yanks me back by my arm andkeeps me from grabbing the handle. Let me go! I yell, struggling to get away. Scarlett, what s wrong with you? Have you beendrinking or something? Oh, right! Because anyone who d be upset aboutbeing two-timed has to be wasted right? What & ? Youthought I d be okay about sharing? Well, wake up,asshole.I m not that kind of girl.He opens his mouth to respond, but his words are cutoff by a very unhappy-sounding wail coming from behindthe closed door. What the fuck is that? I whisper, worried he actuallyhas some sort of bobcat or leopard in his back bedroom.Did he want to introduce me to his exotic pet collection?Did I get this completely wrong? That s her [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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